Travel Wisconsin: More UFOs Visit State

It seems each new day brings another troubling statistic. Prices are rising, the polar ice caps are shrinking, and economic growth remains flat. No matter the number du jour, it’s never good. But this week, possibly the most disturbing figure yet came to light. It seems reports of unidentified flying objects in Wisconsin jumped by a whopping 48% last year.

According to the National UFO Reporting Center, there were 74 sightings across the state in 2025. And if movies and TV shows have taught us anything, this could be the precursor to a full-fledged alien invasion. Outside of a few comedies and family films, a horde of visiting spacemen is typically up to no good, taking over our capital cities, blowing up various monuments with death rays, and generally causing a commotion.

But rather than jump to conclusions, the Drink Wisconsinbly Week in Review Editorial Board would like to offer a less sensational theory as to why we’ve become the Disneyland of the cosmos.

Perhaps some extraterrestrials got wind of all Wisconsin has to offer tourists. Our state’s natural beauty alone is worth a trip across the galaxy. The forests, lakes, and rivers are breathtaking, especially if you come from a dusty, dreary planet like Mars. Maybe the aliens just want to enjoy the scenery and subscribe to the credo of nature enthusiasts, taking nothing but pictures and leaving nothing but footprints. Or, in their case, tentacle prints.

Or, better yet, maybe they’re shape-shifters, peacefully walking among us and pumping money into the local economy. If they want to visit and spend their hard-earned moon bucks at our stores and restaurants, what harm is there in that?

As long as they’re not bothering anybody — and continue not blowing things up in spectacular fashion or enslaving all of humanity to toil in their stuffy space mines — why not just enjoy the cultural exchange?

After all, we tolerate visitors from Illinois. How much worse can an influx of tourists from Planet Zebutron 16 actually be?